Soybeans and Adventure

While sweeping the floor this afternoon, I was pondering on a great many things. It's interesting how you can have entire dialogues and arguments in your head -- examining the pros and cons of certain actions, reflecting on a certain philosophical idea -- in a much more elegant, more succinct way, and at a much more rapid pace than you can when you actually try to articulate it, in either spoken words or written on the page (or blog). That fact opens up an interesting discussion about whether language is really necessary for thought, or for the communication of ideas...but that topic is for another time.

As I said, as I was sweeping the kitchen floor this afternoon, I was reflecting on how much I've enjoyed being home. Since coming home from Korea, with its bustling citylife and millions of people, I've come to deeply appreciate the quiet of the small-town life here in Martin. The things I used to scoff at -- the acres of soybean fields inside the city limits, cows grazing in a roadside pasture next to the main street, the small, old-fashioned downtown --I now find soothing and even compelling. What can be more beautiful than the verdant velvet carpet of soybeans against the darker green backdrop of the trees, spread out under the brilliant blue summer sky dotted with towering clouds? More than ever before, I am content with being at home with my family, surrounded by not much of anything and not doing much.

And yet, another part of me misses all the hustle and bustle and excitement of the city. Part of me loves action movies and adventure stories and explosions, and longs to explore an as-yet undiscovered strange new land. What is it about myself that has such diametrically opposed desires? Are all of us made up of these "opposing forces", in a manner of speaking? Because it's not just in this matter that I find myself at odds with myself. Is all humankind striving between two or more forces that pull in opposite directions?

What great weather we've had lately

Mom and I finally figured out my financial aid situation, and frankly, it's not all that hot. Mom submitted all the paperwork that was required before I even came home, but it wasn't until about five months later -- in the middle of June -- that they calculated my award and sent it to me. I'm not sure why that is, but sadly, even though tuition and housing costs have risen and our family has more kids in college now (three! plus my dad's doing his doctorate), they gave me less aid than my original award my freshman year. That leaves me with about a $6000 gap between my aid and my expenses, and I have to find it before August. I might end up just having to take out a personal loan and start working two jobs to cover everything. If you could spare a couple of seconds to send up some prayers on my behalf, I would greatly appreciate it. 

This week marks the fifth week of work, with two more left in the summer program (it ends the last Friday in July). School doesn't start at SJC until the end of August, so I'm seriously thinking about going out to Annapolis a couple of weeks early, crashing on someone's couch, and spending that time hunting for a job -- or two. Mom and I haven't talked about it yet, really. For sure, though, I won't have a job here after the 24th. I can't believe how fast June went, and now July is speeding along, too! Speaking of July, this last weekend was the Fourth of July. As much as I love Korea and want to go back, it sure was nice to celebrate the Fourth in the good ol' US of A. :D Our family, at the invitation of (and with the generous support of) a couple in our ward, spent a wonderful three-day vacation at Reelfoot Lake, about 45 minutes from home. They went last year, too, but as I was in Korea, I didn't get to go. We went on a three-hour pontoon boat tour of the lake and got to see lots of herons, egrets, some turtles and ducks and even a copperhead! Some of the braver among us (not me, in other words) had froglegs for breakfast one morning. Surprisingly, they're really huge! I thought they'd be little and spindly, but these frogs much be the size of small chickens -- either that, or they did a lot of leg presses prior to being cut off and fried. We went swimming in the lake, went fishing, and watched part of a History Channel documentary on the Revolutionary War, and Friday night we had an awesome time shooting off lots and lots of fireworks. Growing up in Utah, you associate fireworks that explode in the sky with stadiums and big crowds, and only get to shoot the ground-bound ones off with your family or neighborhood. But when you live in a state that is 3/4 water, they let you shoot off all kinds of fireworks! And of course, I got completely devoured by mosquitos despite liberally applied amounts of bug repellant. (I think at last count I was over 30.) Thankfully, I've avoided sunburn for the last couple weeks, so at least I didn't have to suffer that.

Last night we had the missionaries and my boss over for dinner. It was a really great time. I'd been warning Mr. Robert about the craziness of dinner at our house...only to bring him home to perfectly behaved children. I swear, it's a first for our entire existence, and I know they did it out of spite. My mom made a great meal, and the elders shared a message that really seemed to touch Mr. Robert. He even chimed in after Elder Teuscher (that's too-shur) had finished presenting his message about serving Christ as we serve others (Mosiah 2:17) with a great insight of his own, and we had a lovely discussion about changing our attitudes towards the efforts we make for other people. My dad even sang part of "A Poor Wayfaring Man of Grief" a cappella. I'm grateful for the member missionary opportunities this job has given me. My testimony of the importance of member missionary work is growing every day -- and now that the mission president has whitewashed the ward next to us and put in sisters, maybe I'll even get to go on exchanges with them! It's only an hour drive, after all. :)

That's about all there is of interest, really. Rick came home at the last transfer, so we FINALLY, after almost two years, get to talk on the phone to each other without obtaining permission from President. It's been fun to hear the latest news from the mission and hear about his experiences with some of the people I got to serve with as well. Interestingly enough, I'm having just as hard a time transitioning back into calling him "Rick" again as I did trying to remember to call him "Elder Murphy" when we first went to the MTC. I am sad to admit, though, that he knows more Korean vocab than I do -- probably due to four transfers with a native companion instead of my one and only. I spell better, though, so it's not a complete loss. :)